It Nearly Wasn't Christmas...Or Was it?

      Merry Christmas!  As I type this, it is the morning of December 25, 2020.  I just got the turkey in the oven.  My husband and I enjoyed yesterday evening at the Christmas Eve service at church, then went around looking at Christmas Lights.  We are jovial, enjoying the season and also reflecting on Christ coming to earth.  

     Growing up, I loved watching the fun Christmas movies on TV every year.  I just found one of my old favorites on YouTube.  Upon watching it, I couldn't stop laughing!  I felt it was the perfect candidate to be made fun of in this blog!  My next post really will be about a TV show (I've even started writing it already), but I couldn't resist the opportunity to analyze the 1989 made-for-TV movie, It Nearly Wasn't Christmas.  Whether you ever saw it or not, read on for some good laughs!

     This movie is, in some ways, the antitheses of what a jolly Christmas movie should be!  Whoever wrote this story had an intense, melancholic temperament.  I have that side to me, and this movie definitely feeds into that.  Some things are beautifully done when they capture intense, moody emotions, but this is just kind of morose.  The highest mark I can give it is the music.  The score (and the titular song, which is played at the end of the movie) were written by Kurt Bestor, a very talented composer who would go on to do the scoring for the Feature Films for Families movies.  One of the actors in this film (who sings and plays the main song) is Wayne Osmond, who, of course, brought some musical talent into the movie.  So as far as music is concerned, the movie is actually a high quality development.  As for plot...well...read on.  

     The movie starts with Santa Claus having a pity party about people being too selfish (his temperament is nothing like any other Santa Claus in any other movie!  He barely laughs in the entire thing!).  He is considering quitting Christmas.  While he is speaking with Mrs. Claus about this, a letter arrives from a little girl named Jennifer Baxter, asking Santa to get her family back together for Christmas.  We are shown that Mr. Baxter had moved to California from Chicago earlier in the year to write music.  His wife and daughter are still in Chicago, waiting for him to be ready to reunite them.  He keeps making excuses, and the viewer learns that he has actually lost his job at Wonder Records, and is ashamed to tell them.  He has landed a job playing the piano at a mall.  So, we know Mr. Baxter hasn't been honest with his family.  Bad boy.  His wife and daughter don't know this yet, though.  Jennifer wants to visit Daddy for Christmas, but her mother is against the idea.  So, Jennifer turns to a higher power, Santa Claus.  Anyway, Santa's wife, Mrs. Claus, is probably my favorite character in the movie.  She cheerfully takes her husband's negativity in stride, and is able to persuade him to go down among the people to see that they really do care.  In the process, he must get the Baxter family back together.  Santa asks his wife, "What makes you so sure I'll give in," to which she happily replies, "After three-hundred twenty-three years of marriage..." and his resolve melts away and he chuckles and kisses her hand.  Mrs. Claus really is a little bit controlling, but with such an emotional indulgent husband, she probably has to be.  

          The one rule she gives her husband is that he can't use magic while he's among the people, because "It unnerves them."  He later breaks that promise only once, and has good reason.  In this scene, we also meet Santa's elves, who are very scared of the possibility of Santa quitting Christmas and them being out of work.  They all talk in rhyme, except the biggest elf, Philpot.  He got that big by eating too many cookies.

     Anyway, Jennifer Baxter, being a bright young lady, decides to run away from her mother and visit her father.  She goes to the bus station and attempts to buy a ticket.  When the station master is concerned about a child traveling alone and calls security, she runs away from him and gets onto a bus for Los Angeles.  The only vacant seat is next to Santa Claus (who is dressed unassumingly as just a regular old man).  I'll just add that throughout the movie, she gradually starts calling him Mr. Nicholas, and so do other people.  Jennifer starts up a conversation with him right away.  

     The driver approaches Jennifer, asking if she has a ticket.  She freezes, and Santa pulls two tickets out of his pocket and hands them both to him. Jennifer yells "What?  Where?"  Understandably, the driver looks unconvinced, but accepts the tickets and walks away.  So...all is succeeding for Jennifer's great runaway plot.  But then, after Mr. Nicholas has been kind to her, she suddenly says, "I shouldn't talk to strangers.  Maybe, I should get off."  And she gets up to leave.  "Maybe," Santa counters, "you should take this," and he holds up the letter she had written.  This amazes her, and she sits back down.  She exclaims, "You're Santa Claus!" excitedly, while the other passengers look confusedly at them.  

     After he has convinced Jennifer to stay on the bus with him, he then tells her they need to get off and call her mother at the next stop.  We really aren't sure what his actual plan is.  Their next stop happens to be Denver, Colorado.  Seriously.  No stop between Chicago and Denver.  Makes sense, right???

     In Denver, they meet a con artist named Napoleon, who has a fake parrot on his shoulder that he says is named Velma, and makes it talk.  It appears he believes Velma is real, because he converses with it.  Napoleon is running an illegal raffle, and while Jennifer calls her mother, Santa is arrested with Napoleon and taken to jail (I guess the police in Denver aren't very bright and just arrest everyone who happens to be near a criminal--I say this tongue in cheek).  This does nothing for Santa's mood, and he retreats even deeper into his depression.  Unbeknownst to Jennifer or Santa, Napoleon stuffs all the raffle money into Jennifer's backpack.  

     Santa acts as if Napoleon has done something totally unforgivable, and says, "You've hurt a lot of people, but I'll try to forgive you."  In the very next scene, the officer who comes back to talk to them is very harsh with Napoleon, and Santa says, "That's no way to talk!  He's a decent human being!"  Huh?  What did I miss?  He went from unforgivable to decent in a few seconds.    

     Jennifer hangs out at the jail, until Philpot the elf comes to bail Santa out.  He does this with a gold block.  The clerk doesn't seem think of this is odd.  He just says, "With that, you could bail out the Jolly Green Giant!"  Philpot laughs, then confusedly asks, "Who is he?"  

     Jennifer leaves with Santa and Philpot, while Napoleon remains in jail.  Meanwhile, Jennifer's mother is racing to Denver as fast as she can.  Considering Santa wanted Jennifer to call her mother, it is odd he is willing to take Jennifer further on this crazy trip when her mother is on the way.  She arrives too late.  She is furious with the police officers at the station, demanding, "You let her leave with a man who says he's Santa Claus?" to which the officer defensively and dismissively replies, "Hey lady, what can I tell you?  He was bailed out by an elf.  A very wealthy elf."  She shouts, "You're a lunatic, that's what I can tell you!" and is ignored.  At this point she meets Napoleon at the station.

     Napoleon has convinced everyone he is a changed man and is sorry for the raffle scheme, which of course is untrue.  He convinces Mrs. Baxter to bail him out and he will help her find Jennifer and Mr. Nicholas.  As the viewers, we know that his motive is to get the money from Jennifer's backpack.  Mrs. Baxter, in desperation, bails him out, and they race out of there.  They almost catch Jennifer, Santa and Philpot, who are about to take off in a hot air balloon.  Jennifer doesn't want her mother to take her home, so she turns on the helium and sends the balloon up, evading her mother.  Bad girl!  Now, Mrs. Baxter and Napoleon will be traveling to Los Angeles together.  

     After a while, Jennifer, Santa and Philpot start to have some trouble in the balloon.  Philpot looks all over the place with a confused face, then looks down, and, as if he sees something scary, his eyes get big and his mouth drops open, and he shouts, "We're out of fuel!"  Where did he see the fuel if he was looking down?  Anyway, the balloon lands in some little town, supposedly still in the Colorado area.  Santa tells Philpot to go back to the North Pole, but of course he doesn't go.  He follows along, unseen for a while.  

     Jennifer and Santa meet a family who are down on their luck, about to lose their farm.  Their only hope is for their father to win the town's annual sleigh race.  The prize is just enough money to pay their overdue mortgage.  Santa agrees to race on their behalf, since "Who knows more about driving a sleigh than I do?" Jennifer has a silent, passive-aggressive tantrum about this, not wanting him to do it.  Santa tells her, "Jenny, these people need help."  She just sulks, and he tells the family, "I know that Jenny wants me to do it."  I was thinking, "No she doesn't!  Look at her!"  But I do think it was right of him.  

     The banker who is trying to foreclose on this family's farm sends his son out to sabotage their sleigh.  The next day, when Santa races, he uses magic to keep it together.  As he does so, he yells, "Forgive me for breaking my promise, dear!" This is in reference to his promise to his wife not to use magic.  But I think it was justified.  He wins the race, and the family's farm is saved.  This family of four has decided to believe in Santa Claus.  They escort Santa and Jennifer to the train station and give them a basket of food to tide them over.  Jennifer is emotionally distraught by this time, feeling badly for not wanting Santa to help this family.  She goes on a downward spiral about how there will never be another Christmas with Santa again (since he is still considering quitting).   Depressing music plays to punctuate the mood.  

     When they get off the train, they are mistakenly picked up by the servant of a wealthy businessman.  They are taken to his health food factory.  There, they meet Mr. Woodford and his young teenage son.  The son immediately bonds with Santa, and tells his dad, "I want them to stay here!  Mr. Nicholas tells neat stories!"  To which Mr. Woodford snaps at Santa, "My son never thinks anything is neat!"  He gives them a tour of his factory, still talking in this threatened tone of voice.  He proudly tells them that he is making his employees work on Christmas day.  Jennifer yells at him for this.  Being yelled at by a seven-year-old doesn't have much affect on Mr. Woodford.  He argues with Jennifer (who argues with a child?) that he's all about the "bottom line." 

     Santa uses this as an opportunity to return to his pity party.  He says, "Just when I thought people were starting to care!"  He lumps the whole world population with Mr. Woodford's workaholism.  Not very fair if you ask me.  And, if that's as bad as he thinks the world can get, not giving someone Christmas off, Santa needs to see some things going on in certain parts of the world, seriously!  

     Well, Philpot has been following them all this time.  He reveals himself to Jennifer, and the two of them set off to help the employees at Mr. Woodford's factory get a Christmas break from work.  They really just proceed in destroying the factory.  When Santa and Mr. Woodford catch them, Jennifer says in a pouty voice that she was just trying to be unselfish.  Mr. Woodford demands "Who is that creature!" pointing at Philpot.  Santa tells him it's one of his elves.  Mr. Woodford laughs derisively at this and says sarcastically, "And I suppose you're Santa Claus."  Santa replies calmly, "If you say so."  Suddenly, Mr. Woodford looks shocked and says my favorite line in the entire movie: "Holy profits and losses!  You are Santa Claus!"  

     Okay, wait a minute.  Nothing happened to give him any sort of convincing proof that this is Santa Claus.  He is a cynical man who only cares for money.  His factory gets all torn up by Jennifer and Philpot, and Santa says, "If you say so," and this convinces him?  If you're going to have a story with an impossible situation (Santa being real), you at least have to make the characters act realistically.  How would you act if you were faced with having to conclude Santa was real?  The family in the previous vignette with the sleigh race at least believed because it was a touching moment with warm fuzzies, and Santa actually did something for them.  Mr. Woodford didn't have any motive for suddenly believing!  And yet he does.  He then decides to give his employees Christmas off of work.  He tells them all, "And we all owe it to this clever young lady," referring to Jennifer.  What did Jennifer do that was clever?  What did anyone in this whole movie do that was clever?  

     Anyway, from there, they go to Los Angeles, and discover that Mr. Baxter no longer works for Wonder Records.  Jennifer is understandably upset.  Santa uses a payphone to call his wife and ask if she can find Mr. Baxter in the naughty or nice computer, but she is unable to locate him, since he no longer believes.  This makes Philpot cry.  Jennifer goes into pity party mode.  They happen to be walking through a mall, and Jennifer suddenly hears a song her father had written for her.  She perks up and says, "That's my song!"  Santa asks, "Really?" in a sort of condescending tone, as though he is humoring an idiot (come to think of it...).  She runs in the direction of the music and finds her father playing the piano.  He is shocked to see her (no doubt).  His wife and Napoleon eventually catch up, and it's this touching family moment.  Mrs. Baxter says, "I was so stupid!"  How was she stupid?  For believing her husband's lies?  He says, "No, I should have told you the truth and come home."  No, duh!  It seems like everything is settled between them all.  In reality, they would need some major counseling!  How long would he have let the deception continue?  Maybe Jennifer did everyone a favor by running away!

     Well, Napoleon then yells, "Where's my money!" and starts trying to rip off Jennifer's backpack.  Her parents, Santa and Philpot just stare at them awkwardly, no one trying to help.  And...it's been two or three days since he put the money into her backpack.  How is it that Jennifer hasn't discovered it was there?  You see her in different clothes between the two scenes, so you know she had to have gotten into her backpack, and yet the money goes unnoticed.  

     As soon as Napoleon has the cash in his hand, Santa then springs to action and says, "That's the raffle money!"  Napoleon responds by knocking him down.  He hits his head and loses consciousness.  Jennifer screams. Napoleon tries to run, but Mr. Baxter grabs him until a security guard comes up and takes him.  Meanwhile, a crowd is gathering as Santa seems to be dying.  His skin turns an unnatural purple color.  Jennifer sadly tells him, "Without you, all the hopes and dreams of all the world's children will disappear."  Morose, just like the rest of this film.  She should do commercials for Feed the Children!  

     Mrs. Baxter tells her, "Oh, Jennifer, don't."

     Mr. Baxter adds, "There are some things people just can't do anything about."  What does that mean?  Just let him die?  No CPR or first aid or anything?  Just give him up as a lost cause?  Yeah, that makes sense...

     Philpot runs for a doctor.  Jennifer, meanwhile tells the crowd, "If you believe in Santa Claus, let him know!"  

     A boy says, "I...I believe in Santa Claus," sort of awkwardly.  

     Napoleon, still in the security guard's custody, lamely says, "I believe in Santa Claus."

     The rest of the crowd all nods their heads and murmurs that they believe.  Again...no proof!  They see an unconscious man on the ground and a little girl demanding they tell Santa they believe, so they do.  One of the women in the crowd totally cracks me up.  She sort or shrugs as she nods with the others, as though to say, "I'm not into this, but if it'll help, why not say I believe?"  I love it!  Even though she doesn't speak, she's the best actor in the film!  

     Anyway, Santa regains consciousness from this, just as Philpot runs up with a well-dressed man carrying shopping packages and yells, "I found a doctor!"  The man says, "I'm actually a pediatrist."  Santa tells Jennifer, "I'm glad you never stopped believing in me!"  He then tells Philpot, "You've finally done something right!"  I guess getting a pediatrist was right???  

     Mr. Baxter is just sitting at his piano, depressed.  Jennifer tells him, "Because of Santa, we get to spend Christmas together," to which he replies (sounding like he's about to cry), "That makes me so glad." But he doesn't sound very glad.  He and Santa have a little pep talk about facing their failures, and Santa says, "Your daughter helped me see you can really count of people after all, so I'm not going to quit Christmas, I'm going to celebrate!"  How did Jennifer show him this exactly?  Who could they count on in this movie?  No one does anything unexpectedly benevolent to them.  But whatever it takes, Santa.  Philpot is ecstatic and shouts repeatedly, "I have a job!" Mr. Baxter is then inspired to start playing the piano and singing the song he'd been working on all this time but hadn't been able to finish.  Everyone in the mall, who still stood around watching awkwardly, starts singing along, just like in the movies...Oh...wait...this is a movie.  I forgot, since it's so realistic.  

     After the song, Santa has Jennifer spin a magic snowflake, and it starts snowing in the mall.  Everyone is just pleasantly happy about this, but not really amazed that it is snowing inside a building (and in Los Angeles, no less, where it never, ever snows, even outside!).  I guess anything can happen in the mall at Christmastime.

     When no one is looking, Santa taps the side of his nose and disappears.  But his voice says, "To Jennifer, who brought Christmas back to all of us...Ho! Ho! Ho!"  And the credits roll.  That makes...sense.  What is "to Jennifer" exactly?  The credit for saving Christmas?  Can she even hear him saying this?  It doesn't really make it clear.  

     What is the big takeaway from this film?  1) Running away solves all kinds of problems.  It might even save Christmas.  2) Santa Claus is real ("Holy profits and losses!").  3) Police officers in Denver just arrest everyone in sight, no questions asked.  4) Telling Santa you believe in him can medically save his life.  5) It's okay to use magic if you're helping people.  6) The fuel for hot air balloons is stored inside the passenger basket.  7)  Not giving your employees Christmas vacation is about as low as a human being can stoop.  8)  At Christmastime, if you sing a song you're just making up right then, everyone will magically know the words and sing along with you.   9) It can snow inside buildings if you spin a magic snowflake. 

     On a slightly more serious focus, this is a fun, wholesome family film that can give the warm fuzzies at Christmas.  While it does a poor job of it, there is a message that Mr. Baxter was wrong to deceive his family, so I guess that's a positive point to portray.  That's about it as far as good points.  As for concerns, Jennifer is sort of a brat, and causes her parents so much trouble in this (well, she causes her mom so much trouble.  Her dad doesn't even know she ran away until she sees him in the mall, so I guess he was in ignorant bliss the whole time).  Since Jennifer's running away ends up solving everyone's problems, it inadvertently teaches that the end justifies the means.   It also implies that there is no Christmas without Santa Claus.  There is no reference to the real meaning of Christmas at all.  The only reference to God at all is when the family who almost loses their farm in the sleigh race part prays and talks about God.  They are clearly a God-fearing American family.  As for the whole issue of the Baxter family's problems, it is disconcerting that Mr. Baxter would lie to his wife and daughter all this time.  How long would this have gone on?  In a real situation like this, counseling would be needed.  There would be some damaged trust, and it really glosses over the seriousness of that.  It's just a fun movie, so it isn't meant to be thought-provoking.  It just has such a strong emotional feel to it.  In this way, it engages the emotions without engaging the mind, and that can be a recipe for disaster.   

     Did Christmas nearly not happen, as the title and song imply?  Nah!  December 25 didn't get wiped off the calendar.  That title would really be better suited to a movie where the calendar wants to skip from December 24 to December 26...but I don't think that would be a very interesting movie.  This movie's story, rather than Christmas not happening, is about how some people almost had a bad Christmas, but that doesn't sound as good for a title, does it?  Would you watch a movie called, Some People Almost had a Bad Christmas?  Not me!  So I guess the title was good, though inaccurate!  

     I have worked on writing this off and on today.  Now, we have enjoyed our turkey, yams, potatoes and gravy, plus the cheesecake my husband made (his grandmother's recipe).  I wish you a merry Christmas!  Let me know your favorite bad/good Christmas movies!  Maybe I'll write about them in the future!  Until next time...